Silver lining, light at the end of the tunnel, who knows

For the last several weeks, maybe even last month or so, I have been on a Hell bent journey to go there. Hell would be a better place then where I am right now in life. Yesterday at Church, something didn't touch me, but had me sit back and make me think. I know the first talk was on music and how it can influence our lives to be better and make life easier. I have always thought that and know it to be true. Even on my darkest days, music has pulled me from the depths of hell I felt I was in and pulled me free. Some words of the hymns that were discusses, didn't really hit me, but made me think. Who am I really, why am i here, where am I going after this? Then something stuck me while waiting for Chris at her moms place. Do i really know who my Saviour is? Have I asked Him who He is? I have always been told who He is, and why he did what He did. And thats what I beleived to be gospel. But I never really came to that conclusion that I needed to know who He was to me, not to anyone else. I am just beginning the journey that I know will someday bring back the spirit and find me somewhere. As they say, you can't know another unless you walk a mile in their shoes. Maybe I need to do that. Walk a mile in the Saviours shoes and see what He see's, say what He would say, do what He would do. I do not know where this will lead me, but it will be a better place then where I am now.